I remember the time that a brewery opened in the early nineteenth century. They were fantastic because they swore on that day that they would never sell their business for millions of pounds in the future because they....
Wait, sorry, have I remembered that incorrectly? Sorry. You must forgive me - y'see, I don't really understand business.
I do, however, remember a brewing business opening in 2011. Their focus was on the quality of their beer and they swore on that day that they'd never value it at £250million. They never wanted to make money, even on the day that...
What's that? Sorry, is that wrong again? Oh, you must forgive silly me. Y'see, I don't really understand business.
However, I do remember speaking to a recent man of business. Whilst he was busy businessing he said to me that his business often paid £250million to businesses to never change them or gain any profit from them and to not infiltrate the market that they held at all in any w....
Eh? Have I not got that one right? Boy oh boy, I really do not understand business.
That's the problem with business - it is far too complicated for laymen like me to wrap our heads around. There are all these pesky details in the way; all those big numbers and detailed contracts. I try to understand it - I really do - but I just don't get it.
Because I'm such a fool I sometimes get these ideas in my head that not all business acquisitions and market moves can be viewed as positives. I sometimes reference history - which I really shouldn't because, *hits head with palm* when has that ever taught us everything - and that makes me think I should side with caution. Caution isn't okay. Caution is for the weak. Caution is for those afraid of capitalism, progress and "The City." Caution is for those who don't understand business.
And if we have learnt anything from this last week it is that people like me really really do not understand business.
People actually say it. They say that in little posts they write. And people share it. In its finality. If you actually question this... if you do not see this as anything but a positive... if your puny brain cannot comprehend... if you even tried to pretend you understand business....
Imagine having the actual hubris to not hold the same opinion of somebody else when it comes to business. Imagine not thinking that anything but progressive capitalism is positive. Imagine siding with that caution. Imagine just wanting to take a step back and question the motives of bigger conglomerates.
But, actually, don't imagine. Because there are not two sides to this business. There is one side; one view. There is one opinion to have. And if you don't have that opinion then....
Shall I tell you about another business? Beer writing. Beer writing is business. People have to earn money. Some of that money comes from big southern breweries who "sponsor" numerous writers and publications and Dark Orders in return for nothing but decent content. They help support those writers for no gain of their own. Winning Brewery of the Year is entirely unrelated.
But maybe I've got that wrong because I don't really understand business.
So I'll continue to write not understanding business and comment on business that I don't really understand and mention beer that I will still get to love even when it is back to being owned by a single digit number of businesses.
That I wouldn't even understand anyway.
Tupac Shakur Rest in Peace. He was the Best. My Respect. Yeah. C'mon.