"Now I think we collectively as a people
Should rise against this corporate jolly noise
And tell the world 'Let's buy some piece and quiet for a change'
Before we spend it all on fucking toys"
I'm finding it difficult to write about this beer as the reindeer on the label is likely to take my soul if I say anything negative.
I'd like to tell you about Oakleaf Brewery from Gosport, Hampshire being founded in 2000 and how I've never come across any of their beers before but I'm afraid that I might be saying it all under duress as those evil eyes watch me from the bottle as I take each sip from my glass. I'm not sure what this Reindeer's "delight" is but I can only assume it comes from harvesting souls or coming around on Christmas eve to kidnap humans to feast on for the next 365 days. This reindeer is humourless, soulless and lifeless, which is ironic when we consider the beer...
This beer pours like the blood of the reindeer's enemies diluted with water. It's as flat as a catholic's 4th century view of the earth's shape. There's some decent intrigues happening on the nose: cooking apples, bramble bushes and raisins. This isn't the worst tasting beer ever either - mainly because I don't mind apple juice. I don't mean cider, I mean apple juice. I like Copella. But this isn't quite Copella. I believe Volvic do a flavoured water now that is just water with a hint of apple. It may well be this, though they diluted in a teaspoon of a mildly hoppy beer to try and create the illusion that this has been brewed rather than just fashioned. It's drinkable because it's flavoured water. It's not a delight. It's not festive and I'm not going to even peel the label off this bottle as that dead eyed reindeer will feast on my brains if it remains in my house any longer. This beer certainly claimed my Christmas spirit.
Christmas Spirit Rating: .......................................................
Revisit: Boggart's Christmas Rum Porter
The explosive Noel de Calabaza